The Human Pangaea
by Shigeru Hiko
Summary: Kaworu and Shinji talk about pangaea, and how it relates to humanity and connecting to each other. Warning: Contains slash.


Author's Note: I wrote this for a friend as a response to a prompt challenge. I hope that it's good enough for her. I really enjoyed writing it.

If I've screwed up Evangelion too badly, I am really sorry! But I think I've got it right. Enjoy. :

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"The world was whole once."

Shinji shifted nervously in the bed next to Kaworu. His friend had been the one to insist there was enough room in the bed for them both. Shinji had hesitated, not wanting to be so close to anyone. But Kaworu had won the argument. With Kaworu so close to him that he could feel the warmth of his body, Shinji was even more convinced. But despite his discomfort at first, Shinji had managed to relax. It was almost pleasant, being so close to someone he could call a friend.

"Scientists call it Pangaea," he continued. "It's a Greek word. The idea is that all the continents of the world were together at one point. So you could have walked from Japan to Europe and the Americas, all the way to Antarctica and Australia, and never see the ocean."

"Really?" Shinji asked. "I don't remember hearing that in school."

Kaworu laughed. "Well, I don't remember where I learned it. I heard about it when I was a kid, I suppose. But it's true. There's all sorts of proof of this. They've found similar fossils in Africa and South America, and if you look at the structure of the world before the melted ice caps, you can see where it all fits together like a rough jigsaw puzzle. The continents are probably still in shift, you know. Scientists just have bigger things on their minds then what a map will look like in a million years."

"If there's a map to be had in a million years," Shinji replied. Kaworu laughed.

"Oh, I'm not worried about the Earth. She's survived worse plagues then humanity. Earth will survive. Humanity might not, but the Earth will."

"If humanity dies out, what's the point? What happens to us?" Shinji asked. He looked at Kaworu, trying to find some kind of solace in his friend's face. All he saw was that sad, knowing smile. "Death's the end of us, isn't it?"

"Is it?" Kaworu replied. He sat up, and looked down at Shinji, smiling. "No one knows what comes after life, Shinji. Death, yes, but after that? Is death really the end of a human? Are you only the meat that houses your intellect?" Kaworu touched Shinji's arm, startling him. His hand went up to Shinji's head, and tapped it. "Or are you more then that? Do you have a soul? If when we die, it's just a physical death, what happens to the rest?" Kaworu brushed the hair out of Shinji's face gently.

Shinji was surprised that he hadn't flinched at Kaworu's kindness, and felt strangely peaceful and pleasant about it. It felt nice. "What do you think comes after death?" he asked. "I've never thought about it."

"Human Pangaea," Kaworu replied. He smiled at Shinji, and it made Shinji feel left out of some secret. "As the world breaks apart, and humanity dies, they reform in death, a Pangaea of the human soul. One conscious, all knowing and all understanding. There would be no fighting, just peace. Maybe not on Earth, but peace."

Shinji stared at his friend in awe. Leaning down, Kaworu looked into his eyes, thoughtful. Shinji could feel Kaworu's breath on his face, gentle and warm.

"Why do you think sex is so enjoyable?" Kaworu asked, softly. "It's not just a physical reaction. People like to do it. Some like to do it often. I think it's because it is the physical representation of the joining in one consciousness. That's why there is satisfaction in the aftermath of sex. It's because you've reached that connection, even if it was only for a moment."

Shinji froze for a moment when Kaworu moved over him, pinning him to the bed. He felt trapped, and his heart started to race.

"Kaworu," he said. "What are you doing?"

"Shinji." The way the other boy whispered his name made goose bumps on his skin. Kaworu's face leaned close, his eyes closing, breathing slowly. "Shinji, I want to connect with you."

It took Shinji a moment to understand what Kaworu had said, and what he meant. Kaworu waited, his face hovering above Shinji, smiling but serious. Shinji swallowed, unable to answer.

"Shinji, I—"

"Kaworu, we're both . . . we're both guys. Isn't that strange? Aren't we supposed to . . . to connect with women?" Shinji could feel his face get hot, and turned away from Kaworu.

"In the end, we're all the same. Male, female, why does it matter?" Kaworu tilted Shinji's face back towards him, and smiled. "We're all meant to be one, Shinji. The physical part shouldn't matter."

Shinji looked up at Kaworu. He knew that the other boy was waiting for an answer, waiting for him to decide. There was so little in Shinji's life that he had control over, so little that he could decide. He could choose what to eat and what to wear, but he had to go to school, he had to pilot the Eva. He could try and rebel against either as much as he wanted, but in the end, he'd have to.

Kaworu was giving him a choice.

"Kaworu."

"Shinji?"

"I . . . I want . . . I," Shinji stumbld for the words he wanted. He wanted to say yes, wanted to trust Kaworu enough that this wouldn't be hard. He looked up into Kaworu's eyes, patient and waiting for an answer. His hand reached for Kaworu's face, shaking. Kaworu, leaned into it, and kissed Shinji's palm.

"I want to, too." Shinji couldn't bring himself to say it all, but he knew Kaworu would understand.

Kaworu's lips gently touched Shinji's, kissing him. Everything that Kaworu did with Shinji was gentle and slow, allowing Shinji to relax. Shinji wasn't afraid of touching others, he was just so unused to it. Kaworu's hand slid down Shinji's chest, to his waist, down to his thigh. Shinji's arms were around Kaworu's neck, their lips joining in long, sweet kisses.

He felt Kaworu's hand linger between his legs, hand stroking him through his pants. It was different, having someone else do it, it didn't seem so dirty or wrong. He moaned, arching into Kaworu's touch. "Kaworu," Shinji whispered, "Kaworu."

"Shinji," Kaworu said quietly. Shifting in the bed, he carefully parted Shinji's legs, slow and easy. Kaworu could sense the hesitation in Shinji, and whispered in his ear. "Relax," he said. "I won't hurt you. I will never hurt you."

His legs parted for Kaworu, and he watched as the other boy leaned down with the intent of doing to him what Shinji had only dreamed about before. He felt Kaworu's lips kiss him, kindly teasing.

He cried out when he felt a finger enter him, scared and nervous at what Kaworu was doing. He'd only had a very basic conception of sex before, actually doing it was totally different. But looking down at Kaworu's face, he felt less scared. He remembered what Kaworu said, he would not hurt Shinji.

Kaworu took his time, and Shinji adjusted to the feeling of Kaworu's fingers inside of him. What was uncomfortable at first because less so, because more enjoyable and pleasurable. Shinji bit his lip from making too much noise as he felt Kaworu's fingers, deep inside him.

Kaworu lifted his head away, licking his lips and smiling. He took off his pants, and fear gripped Shinji for a moment, realizing what he meant to do next. But Kaworu soothed the insides of Shinji's thighs, lifting him a bit, trying to find a position that would be comfortable for them both. Leaning down, Kaworu kissed Shinji again, and entered him.

Shinji felt tears squeeze out of the corner of his eyes. It wasn't pain but discomfort. Kaworu's fingers had not been so big. The feeling was intense and overwhelming, he felt his friend waiting for him, waiting for something. Panting, Shinji shifted his hips on Kaworu, and nodded.

Kaworu's thrusts were long and slow, building pleasure as Shinji adjusted to the feeling. It was a strange sensation, and good. He could feel why Kaworu felt this was the body's way of connecting to something greater. As he wrapped his arms around Kaworu's neck, tightly, he moaned, crying out Kaworu's name.

Against his neck, he felt Kaworu's lips brush against him, moaning Shinji's name over and over. Shinji closed his eyes, ignoring the room and concentrating on Kaworu. He could feel their connection, felt it deep inside him, and he yearned for more.

When they came, Shinji felt it. The brief moment that Kaworu had mentioned, the moment of connection. The feeling swallowed him whole, engulfed him as pleasure wracked his body as he reached his orgasm, muscles tightening around Kaworu as his come splattered against his chest. He felt Kaworu come inside of him, a strange but good feeling. Kaworu leaned down and kissed Shinji again, passionately, and Shinji felt himself kissing back without a single thought.

Lying down next to Shinji, Kaworu pulled him close, holding Shinji against his body. Shinji clung to him, filled with wonder that after that, Kaworu still wanted him. Scared of rejection even now, Shinji hesitantly kissed Kaworu's lips, and found himself drowning in their kiss.

"Connection," Kaworu said, hand stroking Shinji's hair. "We're connected now. No matter what."

Shinji nodded, and leaned into Kaworu. Masturbating seemed so dirty to him now, like an empty act devoid of meaning. Almost as if reading his mind, Kaworu kissed Shinji's head, and held him tight. Shinji pushed back unpleasant thoughts, and surrendered to feeling nothing but the good of the moment.

"What happens when there are no more humans then?" Shinji asked. "If we're all connected, but physically dead, what are we? What is that thing?"

"I don't know," Kaworu said, petting Shinji's head. "Maybe that one consciousness is what God is. It would be something all knowing, I think. Maybe, when it's reformed, the choice to start again will be there, and the experiment of humanity will start again. Or maybe it won't. Maybe humanity in the physical form is better off not repeating itself."

"Do you think that would happen?" Shinji asked. "Do you really think that if we did this all again, we'd do it the same?"

"I don't know," Kaworu said. "We're all obviously aware of some greater existence then that of the one we have now. But how much would we remember, not to make the same mistakes again." Kaworu lifted Shinji's chin to face him. "What would you do, Shinji? If the choice was up to you, would you want to retry humanity?"

It took him a moment, to think about. His father was cold, and Shinji was awkward with all of his relationships. But in Kaworu's arms, he'd been able to connect with a part of humanity that he'd failed at before. He'd been able to form a relationship. He'd found caring.

"If it was up to me?" Shinji asked. Kaworu nodded.

"If it was up to me," he said. "I'd say yes."

"Good."


End file.
